Category: Wearables

Trojan Condoms Button
$4.99
via (Amazon)

Avoid late night trips to the gas station with Amazon’s new Trojan Condoms Dash Button. Safe sex is just a click away.

Camo Condom
$1.95
via (Amazon)

With the camo condoms on the job, you can rest easy and relish in the moment as your private invades another private. They’ll never see him coming.

Sponsored By:
The government is a greedy piglet that suckles on a taxpayer’s teat until they have sore, chapped nipples.Ron Swanson
Thug Life Temporary Tattoo
$15
via (Amazon)

Let everyone know what a hardcore thug you are without the life long commitment of a real tattoo with these full size Thug Life temporary tattoos.

Hamburger Earmuffs
$13.95
via (Amazon)

Hamburgers are good for all sorts of things… curbing your hunger, keeping your ears warm… maybe thats about it.

Cat Stockings
$8.95

False thigh high tights with a cat face pattern on the front, cat tail pattern on the back! These clever feline friendly stockings are perfect for the cat lover in us all! What luck will they bring you?

Holy Hound Dog Costume
$10.28

Follow your faith in this Holy Hound Dog Costume. Your little pup will never chase a cat again when he takes the oath in this royal red robe with dog bone cross.

Squirrel Underpants
$9.6

Help a squirrel hide his nuts for winter with these Squirrel Underpants!

Tetris Print Leggings
$9.99

God help us all if they ever release a Candy Crush style.

Kitten Shirt
$11.90

Try your hand at living a fierce feline existence with the Kitten Face Tee.

Sponsored By:
Fishing relaxes me. It’s like yoga, except I still get to kill something.Ron Swanson
Thinking Cap
$12.73

Think, Think, Think

BatDog Costume
$12.99

Bat Dog

Los Pollos Hermanos Shirt
$9.60

Los Pollos Hermanos Shirt – Is today the day Hector?

Portal 2 Earrings
$11.11

Represent what you play!

Bacon Dog Costume
$14.99

Bacon Dog Costume – Get your very own bacon wrapped hot dog… (caution don’t overcook)

Zelda Hearth Shaped Pendant
$14.95

This hand crafted pendant was made with beautifully printed artwork which has been seated in a solid metal plate and covered with a crystal clear glass dome.

Unicorn Mask
$14.20

In short, this mask is creepy… very very creepy.